It's no secret that people, especially females, suffer from bad body image. Everyone has their insecurities. Everyone has dealt with issues in self worth and confidence. And that's okay, because that's a part of life. I wanted to speak on this because, like everyone else, I've dealt with this too. But, not only that, I think that we sometimes forget how important self worth and self confidence is in our spiritual journey back to our Heavenly Parents. And it's very important.
Remember you were created in God's image. In a physical sense you, in a small way, represent your Heavenly Father. How can you say you love Him if you don't love yourself?
Not loving yourself is disrespectful to yourself and your Heavenly Father. He created you and He loves you, so when you don't show that love for yourself you're taking for granted what God has created.
"Date yourself. Take yourself out to eat. Don't share your popcorn at the movies with anyone. Stroll around an art museum alone. Fall in love with canvases. Fall in love with yourself." -Unknown
When you love yourself you open your heart to others and let them in. You're happier and that reflects on the outside. When you love yourself you find less reasons to hate another. "To love another you must first love yourself."
Self confidence is a personal journey that's different for everyone. There are plenty of books, articles, and films with help to gain self confidence but it'll be different for everyone. One thing is the same however: your Heavenly Father can and will help you. Counsel with your Heavenly Father and read your patriarchal blessing if you have one (if you don't I encourage you to get one). Take some time off from Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, and Pinterest to give more time to yourself.
The media can be harmful to your self confidence. That's common knowledge, yet we do little to fix it. If you find yourself online and your confidence wanes because of something you see then you know you need to get out. Don't surround yourself with anything or anyone that won't boost your confidence.
I don't think I can stress enough how important this is. When I came to love myself I came to love my Heavenly Father so much more, and I was able to learn more and be truly converted. Remember Heavenly Father loves you. This isn't a trivial love that changes depending on your weight or height or if you fit the media's standards of good looking. No, He loves you so much "He sent His only begotten son." There's nothing trivial about that. In the April 2008 Priesthood session Henry B. Eyring said: "You can feel confidence because you have evidence of His confidence in you." [here's the source if you want to read this talk on the priesthood and confidence]
But to be able to feel His confidence in you you need to start with yourself. Start by being a little selfish and loving yourself. Date yourself. That's a wonderful idea. I've even started doing it and I love it. Do His work. Go do some service for your fellow man, and you will "have evidence of His confidence in you." In D&C 121 we are encouraged to "be full of charity towards all men ... and let virtue garnish [our] thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God."
Understand that you were preordained in the Pre-Mortal estate. He has great plans for you. And He knows you can accomplish those things which He has sent you to do. He has confidence in you. You've be preordained by God. No one else can do the work that He needs you to do. That's huge. But if you let yourself be beat up by low self esteem you won't be able to fully do those things. He needs you to know how wonderful you are. And yes, you are wonderful. So wonderful your Savior took your sins upon himself and died for you.
We all know the phrase, "Through Christ all things are possible." Let's change that around a bit to "through confidence all things are possible." Because confidence is of Christ and Heavenly Father. Satan doesn't want you to have confidence. He doesn't want you to know how wonderful you really are. He wants you to be unhappy like him. He wants you to suffer and turn away from your Heavenly Father.
Stay away from worldly influences that bring you down. Heavenly Father humbles. He doesn't bring us down. He makes us better, not worse. When you really come to understand that and feel of His love, and in turn love yourself, your life will be richer and you will be happier. It starts with you and your decision to do that for yourself. It doesn't start with a new boyfriend or girlfriend, a perfect career, or toned abs.
Heavenly Father will help you. He wants to. Have I said it enough? He loves you.
And ladies, for the love of all that's good and saintly, stop pining your worth on guys. Stop telling yourself you're not beautiful, smart, wonderful, or whatever because you're single or because some guy said otherwise. He's not worth it, and the right guy won't just like you because of your looks. I once heard someone say, "Don't put your worth on someone who's probably thinking about tacos."
If you need some more encouragement, I recommend heading over to Beauty Redefined to read their awesome blogs. Or, you know, you could look into the Young Women's and Relief Society program, which strives to bring girls up in righteousness and help them gain confidence. If you're going to lean on a guy for confidence then at least lean on your Savior. We should learn to lean on Him when we're going through a tough time. We need to lean on him for strength.
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| Um... I like the song too but I don't need that song to make me feel beautiful. |
Your body is a temple. We know this. You may have even heard this your whole life. Treat your body well. I'm not saying you need to be a size two. No. Skinny doesn't necessarily mean healthy (Likewise being "fat" doesn't mean you're unhealthy.). But your body is a gift. Take care of it.
It has been scientifically proven that when you're good to your body you feel better and you're happier. And yes, you love yourself. Why do you think Heavenly Father gave us the Word of Wisdom? So we can be healthy and happy. Don't for one second think dieting to get a "perfect bikini ready body" or "to look thinner and therefore prettier" is the same thing. Do not let the media and Satan fool you. It's great to get healthy, but you must have a healthy mind too.
I personally believe the key to loving yourself is in spending some time alone (date yourself), serving your Heavenly Father, and in taking care of yourself (The Word of Wisdom). And I've learned that when I read my patriarchal blessing and tried to understand how Heavenly Father sees me and my potential I was much happier and I loved myself more. But again, it's a personal journey for all of us.
Know you're not alone in this. Your Heavenly Father and Savior want you to love yourself and they'd be more than happy to help. They know your divine potential. Your Savior died for you. If he didn't think you were worth it he wouldn't go through the atonement for you. He "bled through every pore" because He cares and loves us. Each and every one of us.
You were created in God's image and He loves you. Never forget that. And remember to love yourself. The journey to self love and self confidence starts with you. It doesn't start with a boyfriend or compliments littering your Facebook. It starts with you. Remember to never let anything bring you down. Heavenly Father wouldn't want you to.
I promise that through our Savior and our Heavenly Father you can come to have confidence in yourself and find true joy. The plans They have for us are to bring us joy. Not to bring us down. And, as if I couldn't say it enough, it all starts with you.
What are you doing now to make yourself happier?
Further reading:
- The 2007 Mutual Theme on Real Confidence has some great points
- Here is a post on LDS.org on Spiritual Confidence
- Canaries With Gray on their Wings is a beautiful talk by Thomas S. Monson
- The Self Improvement Mentor has some great points about gaining confidence and comparing ourselves to others
- Oh hey, I wrote a post on comparing ourselves to others!
- They don't call it the positivity blog for nothing
- And I can't talk about Beauty Redefined enough. I love their blogs!
Nice blog... Wise words... I've taught you well. ;-)
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